We were married 24 years ago today. 

It’s really hard to find words to convey the gratitude and wonder I feel, not only when I think about getting to be married to Peter, but also when I think about the people and circumstances that have all contributed to us still being married. We stood in front of over 200 people on that day 24 years ago. And yes, we pledged ourselves to each other. But we also asked those gathered to hold us to it. 

We were pretty sure marriage would bring adventure and wonder and delight, and it did. We didn’t know that marriage would bring heartache and disappointment and dreams deferred. We didn’t know that marriage would bring the growth that only happens by being cracked open. 

I had a chance to read an early version of Esau McCaulley’s new book, How Far to the Promised Land (which comes out in September and is certainly worth a pre-order), and I sent McCaulley’s words, about his marriage, to Peter because they ring so true:

“Ours is like any marriage that lasts. We had to give up enough of ourselves to make room for the other person, but we had to retain a sufficient amount of who we were to avoid bitterness. All marriages become a third thing, neither one partner’s dream nor the other’s, but a different glory, an ordinary one we made together.”

Today, I give thanks for the ordinary glory of this marriage, and I give thanks for the ordinary glory of all the people who have held us together along the way. 

More with Amy Julia:

• 3 Questions We Asked That Really Helped Our Marriage

• The Most Important Thing We Do as a Married Couple

• Thank You, Tim Keller, for Confounding Us All

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